It’s been quite a long time since I last wrote on the topic of Primal Play. A couple of years ago, I wrote about my findings on what Primal Play is, and my discovery that I am also primal. It would be some time until I would write another post about what it means to be primal, and how primals interact with the rest of us. Since then, I find myself in a position where I feel I’ve learned a lot more about Primal Play through my personal experience as a primal, learning from other primals, as well as seeing a need for another post delving even further into what Primal Play entails. Several, actually.
For this one, I’d like to talk about what a scene in Primal Play can look like, and what you may expect to experience/see. First and foremost, Not much equipment is really needed, compared to most other activities in BDSM. Much of what you’ll be using is already equipped on your body(nails, hair, hands, teeth), which is one of the finer things for those just starting Primal Play. However, you may elect to get some padded mats if you intend to have your scene outside of the bedroom.
Like any other scene in BDSM, the first thing any participants need to do is agree to the conditions and activities they will be engaging in during their scene. This will, of course, include an agreement on hard/soft limits and safety words/actions. I understand this may be a bit of a surprise, especially since Primal Play is considered edgeplay because of the potential to lose self-control. I understand the effect primal headspace can have and know how it liberates one to give yourself over to doing all that you hold back wanting to do, but it’s also worth noting that no one ever loses complete control. Somewhere in your mind, you can still interpret what limits are in place, and can even understand when a safety word or action has been used. You’re not a werewolf that has to wait until the primal nature simply wears off.
In addition to limits and safety, participants should also discuss locations of play. As stated earlier, you may want to prepare an area with mats if you plan to play on the ground. Sometimes the participants may want to have a chase, so you should ensure that while the chase may begin elsewhere, it should end at the agreed-upon location. If the scene is for outdoor play, you should establish the limits of the chase area. Finally, participants should discuss if sex will be involved. Yes, sex. Not all primal play scenes will involve intercourse, and may sometimes just be to feel the thrill of freedom without orthodox constrictions. If this sounds like you’re essentially playing tag or hide & seek, you’d be correct.
With that settled, let’s move on to the actual activities.
This will often be the first thing to happen when your primal scene begins and often brings any primal into primal headspace immediately. Think of it as a kind of greeting, just as two animals would circle one another, sniffing one another, taking in their scent and familiarizing themselves to you. You get a feel for your play partner and begin to develop an impression of their emotions and intentions. You size them up and decide whether you would be capable of holding your own against them, or if you should run to keep them from taking you down immediately. It’s actually a very exciting moment in a primal scene, full of suspense and intrigue.
If your play partner is one you have played with before, this act may be more just for getting into the primal headspace. You may also see this as a kind of ‘daring’ moment, where one of you knows what you want to do, and you either go straight for instigating, or become playful and encourage your partner to be the one to start.
Whoever you do this with, it’s all about getting a feel for each other’s energy. Watch for their expressions. Do they look as though they intend to take you down straight away? Do they growl, or purr at you? How do you feel towards your partner?
This is what most people would imagine when they picture what Primal Play is. Immediately following circling your partner comes the floorplay, which is to say, engaging with your partner physically. In many cases, this begins as either wrestling to gain dominance or to submit to your partner, or it can be the start of a chase that ends in floorplay. Let’s start with the wrestling.
There are several ways participants can go about floorplay depending on their personal style and preferences. For instance, participants can struggle with one another to dominate their partner, ending only when one no longer has the strength or fortitude to resist any further and submits to the other partner. In other cases, one might have every intention of immediate submission, and place themselves completely into the predator’s hands. Some may even go so far as to try and resist even with every intention of losing in the end as a means to encourage their partner to be ‘harsher’ with them. If you catch my meaning. I like to call them ‘Primal Brats’.
A chase, on the other hand, is for those wishing to add an extended thrill to floorplay. One participant may simply start running in the hopes that the predator will pursue them. This can be done either outdoors or indoors and is a lot of fun for getting your body going before the predator catches their prey for a takedown that leads immediately into floorplay.
Whether sexual or non-sexual, this can also be done with multiple people involved. There could be one hunter chasing multiple preys, or multiple hunters chasing the same quarry. This can even lead to the Alpha dynamics of Primal Play that I won’t discuss now, but will in a future post.
This step in a primal scene can occur at nearly any point, whether it be during circling, the chase, takedown, or floorplay. It often involves the use of teeth on your partner, but can also include nails. This step is all about taking your partner into yourself, marking them, tasting them, filling yourself with their scent. For the Dominant, this means marking your prey as your own and claiming them as your prize. This can be sexual, or it can be non-sexual. But it is always an intimate moment between the participants.
Some activities that may occur include hard scratching or biting of one’s skin. Scent can be powerful for feeling your partner’s energy, but the feeling is multitudes higher when it involves tasting them. it may also be done with the intention of leaving a mark to remind them of that moment or their connection to you, as well as to show others that this person is marked as your own. On the more sexual side of the spectrum is Queening. Queening is when a woman can hold control by holding their sub’s arms down with their legs, and mount their vulva over their face. It allows them the ability to control whether they can give them pleasure, deny them of it, or even cut off their ability to breathe if they so choose. The reverse can also be done and is appropriately named Kinging.
In summary, circling is about acquainting with your partner and seeing what’s ahead, floorplay is for engaging with that partner, and biting is about making them a part of you. It may sound almost entirely physical, but there’s a very large emotional aspect involved. You become acquainted with someone on a level that most don’t experience outside of a long relationship. A predator can become the protector, and a prey can quickly become nurturer to the Dominant.
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